Hunting

Letter: What’s so sporty about hunting? | Letters

I read an unusual but interesting comment in the Richmond Times-Dispatch from a hunter who praised and applauded our General Assembly for opening up additional “conservation and recreation” opportunities for Virginians by allowing hunting on Sundays.

And I was like, “AHHH, hunting, what a great, wholesome, all-American recreational sport.”

Let’s see if I have the right plan:

First, buy a 4WD boomer truck with a “dog box” in the back. Call all your hunting buddies. Load the dogs and let’s go!

Set the tracking antennas on top of the truck. Put the tracking collars on all 10 tracking dogs. Take the walkie-talkies! Take the binoculars! When the tracker dogs pick up a scent, unleash them to hunt a beautiful black bear that belongs to every Virginian for two miles, until its tongue hangs out.

Let the dogs make him climb a tree for fear of his life.

People also read…

NOW… pull out your “Big Boy Bazooka Gun”… take aim and blast his fracturing head. The lovely bear will fall from the tree, and everyone except the bear will clap their hands.

Hang the trophy bear by its hind legs for all to see!

So what if the bear was walking through the woods two hours ago… just thinking about his own “Dang Bidness”. It’s a free country, you know?

What a great way to enjoy Virginia’s natural resources and the wonderful “conservation and recreation” opportunities they provide.

Yes, hunting is a great, wholesome and all-American recreational sport.